I Never Drink Water... Fish F**k In

Here Is My Best Advice On The Matter Of Deductibles: Just Count Off On Your Fingers All The Items That You Suspect Might Be Deductible - And Then Forget Them, Because They Aren't.

Happiness Means Quiet Nerves.

W. C. Fields, A Lifetime Agnostic, Was Discovered Reading A Bible On His Deathbed. ''i'm Looking For A Loop-hole,'' He Explained.

There Are Only Two Real Ways To Get Ahead Today - Sell Liquor Or Drink It.

Show Me A Great Actor And I'll Show You A Lousy Husband. Show Me A Great Actress, And You've Seen The Devil.