I Hate Movies. They're So Boring. So

Nobody Gets Irony Anymore, As We Are Now Living In The Post-ironic Age. Once George Bush Gets A Library, Our Irony Is Dead.

When, In 1966, I Progressed To The Frost Report, I Was Paid Ten Guineas A Minute. I Was Guaranteed Three Minutes A Week, So This Was Good Money.

I Didn't Want To Be Big Mr. Ego Walking Around.

I Love Being An Older Comic Now. It's Like Being An Old Soccer Or An Old Baseball Player. You're In The Hall Of Fame And It's Nice, But You're No Longer That Person In The Limelight On The Spot Doing That Thing.

My Father, Who Was A Sergeant In The Raf During The Second World War, Was Killed In A Hitchhiking Accident While Returning Home On Compassionate Leave. As A Result, My Mother Had To Get Work, As A Nurse, And At Seven The Raf Put Me Into A Boarding School And Ex-orphanage Called The Royal Wolverhampton School.