I Had No Voice To Talk With

Thanks To The Greatest Invention Of Recent Years, The Mp3-playing Alarm Clock, I Can Now Choose The Song That Wakes Me Up In The Morning.

'american Horror' Is The Debasement Of The Suburban Family, The Way A Lonely Kid Would Have Imagined It In The Seventies.

Sending Paris Hilton To Jail For Being The Most Loathed Celeprosy Lesion In The History Of The Species Seems Like A Happening Idea At First - Forty-five Days At Century Regional Detention Center Is So The New Thirty Days At Promises Malibu! But It Sets A Dangerous Precedent To Jail Celebs Just Because Someone Hates Them.

You Know The Prince Song Where The Girl's Phone Rings But She Tells Him, "whoever's Calling Couldn't Be As Cute As You?" I Long To Live Out This Moment In Real Life.

'the Voice' Has Lots Of Singers Who Fit The 'idol' Mold Of Young, Innocent Ingenues With Psycho Stage Moms. But It Also Has Long-suffering Adult Pros, With A Whiff Of Thirtysomething Despair In Their Voices. That Adds An Edge Of Realness.