I Don't Like Soccer. I Think It

Should Women Be On Any Pills Besides Birth Control? We Should Just Give Them All Sugar Pills For Everything, They're So Suggestible.

I Got Drunk In Canada. I Was There For 2 Days But I Was Drunk There For 4 Days. I Don't Know How It Worked. I Guess It Was With The Time Difference Or Something.

It Should Be Like A Salmon Taking To Open Water. I've Done So Much Morning Radio That I Won't Be Overwhelmed By It, But It's Still Going To Be A Challenge.

In My Early 20s I Was So Miserable Doing Construction, I Wanted Something That Paid Money. I Liked Nice Stuff. I Liked Cars And Architecture, And Things That Cost Money. I Wanted To Not Swing A Hammer, And Make Money… And Not Do Stuff That Was Dirty. I Attempted To Get Into Comedy. I Started To Do Stand-up, But I Wasn’t Very Good At It.

Wearing Crocs Is Like Getting Blown By A Dude. It Feels Great Until You Look Down And Realize You're Gay.