I Don’t Know What Boldness Came Over

I Figured Being A Bed Salesman Was A Job Of Biblically Bad Paradox. I Mean, Here He Was, Forced To Stand For Eight Or Nine Hours A Day, And The Whole Time He’s Surrounded By Beds. And Not Only That, He’s Surrounded By Shoppers Who See The Beds And Can’t Help But Think, Man, I’d Love To Lie Down On That Bed For A Second. So Not Only Does He Have To Stop Himself From Lying Down, But He Has To Stop Everyone Else From Doing It, Too. I Knew If I Were Him, I Would Be Desperate For Human Company.

Wold Domination Is Exhausting And Cliche. People Ought To Just Focus On Being Individual Responsible Citizens Of The Earth Instead Of Assholes.

Drosophila,” I Said, Remembering The Word. “what?” Lily Asked. “why Do Girls Always Fall For Guys With The At Ention Span Of Drosophila?” “what?” “fruit Flies. Guys With The Attention Span Of Fruit Flies.” “because They’re Hot?” “this,” I Told Her, “is Not The Time For Being Truthful.

Usually My Characters, Though Young, Tend To Be Street-wise.

The Handwriting Was A Girl’s. I Mean, You Can Tell. That Enchanted Cursive.