History Is An Account, Mostly False, Of

Tedium, N. Ennui, The State Or Condition Of One That Is Bored. Many Fanciful Derivations Of The Word Have Been Affirmed, But So High An Authority As Father Jape Says That It Comes From A Very Obvious Source --the First Words Of The Ancient Latin Hymn _te Deum Laudamus_. In This Apparently Natural Derivation There Is Something That Saddens.

Monument, N. A Structure Intended To Commemorate Something Which Either Needs No Commemoration Or Cannot Be Commemorated.

Distance, N. The Only Thing That The Rich Are Willing For The Poor To Call Theirs And Keep.

Mustang, N. An Indocile Horse Of The Western Plains. In English Society, The American Wife Of An English Nobleman.

Beg, V. To Ask For Something With An Earnestness Proportioned To The Belief That It Will Not Be Given.