Folks, I've Been Straight For Seventeen Days...

The Russians Haven't Been To The Moon. You Know Why? Because They're Space Pussies... You Really Want To Impress Us? Bring Us Back Our Flag!

My View Of Life Is, 'if You're Going To Miss Heaven, Why Miss It By Two Inches? Miss It!

If I Get Married Again, I Want A Guy There With A Drum To Do Rimshots During The Vows.

Lick The Alphabet. It Makes You Appear Creative, It's An Easy Diagram To Remember, It's Like "aaaaa.... Beeeee.... Ceeee.

I Have Lived A Carnal Life.