Every Important Change In Our Society, For

Life Is Unfair. And It's Not Fair That Life Is Unfair.

If There's Anyone Still Present Whom I've Failed To Insult . . . I Apologize.

In Marriage, The Occasional Catastrophic Crisis Is Easier To Manage Than The Daily Routine.

John Updike: Our Greatest Suburban Chic-boutique Man Of Letters. A Smug And Fatal Complacency Has Stunted His Growth Beyond Hope Of Surgical Repair. Not Enough Passion In His Collected Works To Generate Steam In A Beer Can. Nevertheless, He Is Considered By Some Critics To Be America's Finest *living* Author: Hold A Chilled Mirror To His Lips And You Will See, Presently, A Fine And Dewy Moisture Condensing -- Like A Faery Breath! -- Upon The Glass.

J. Edgar Hoover, J. Bracken Lee, J. Parnell Thomas, J. Paul Getty -- You Can Always Tell A Shithead By That Initial Initial.