Even Arnold's Adviser Says He Was Shocked

President Bush Went Out Touting His Economic Record In Ohio Last Week. Now This Is A State That Lost 225,000 Jobs Since Bush Took Office. You Know, If Bush Wants To Tout His Record, He Should Do It Somewhere Where The Bush Economy Has Actually Created Jobs, Like India, Or Thailand, Or China.

It Really Kind Of Looks Like Now That John Kerry Is On His Way To The Presidential Nomination. The Only Thing That Can Sink John Kerry Now Is An Al Gore Endorsement.

A Dead Body Was Discovered This Week On The Grounds Of A Country Estate Owned By Queen Elizabeth. The Queen Said Today She Hopes This Serves As A Reminder To Anybody On Her Staff That There Is A Right Way And A Wrong Way To Polish Sterling Silver.

The Longest-serving Republican Senator, Alaska's Ted Stevens, Found Guilty Just A Few Hours Ago On All Charges In His Corruption Trial. Do You Know This Story? He Failed To Report He Had Some Work Done On His House. Yeah, Here's The Bad Part. You Know Who Did The Work? Joe The Plumber. Unlicensed.

Isn't This Amazing? Clinton Is Getting $8m For His Memoir, Hillary Got $8m For Her Memoir. That Is $16m For Two People Who For Eight Years Couldn't Remember Anything.