Do Your Kids A Favor - Don't

Humor Gives Presidents The Chance To Be Seen As Warm, Relaxed Persons. Humor Reaches Out And Puts Its Arm Around The Listener And Says, 'i Am One Of You, I Understand,' And Implicitly It Promises, 'i Will Do Something About Your Problems.'

Washington Is A Place Where Politicians Don't Know Which Way Is Up And Taxes Don't Know Which Way Is Down.

I Should Warn You That Underneath These Clothes I'm Wearing Boxer Shorts And I Know How To Use Them.

I Understand The Big Food Companies Are Developing A Tearless Onion. I Think They Can Do It - After All, They've Already Given Us Tasteless Bread.

If At First You Don't Succeed-try, Try Again. Don't Think Of It As Failure. Think Of It As Timed-release Success.