'dammit I'm Mad' Is 'dammit I'm Mad'

A Straw Enables You To Drink Without Using Your Wrist. A Straw Is Your Friend - Until You Lose Eye Contact With The Straw. Then It Will Betray You And Make You Look Like An Idiot.

There's An Old Russian Saying That Goes Some Way Or Another. I Don't Know It. I Don't Speak Russian. But Sometimes I Think About It And Wonder If It's Relevant To What I'm Going Through At The Time. Probably Not. I Mean What Do Russian Know About Hunger, Anyway?

I'm Always Excited To Try Something I Haven't Done.

Our Times, A Brief History: As Televisions Became Flatter, People Became Rounder.

Popcorn Is One Of The Only Situations In Which You Eat The Result Of An Explosion.