Any Professional League That Goes On Strike

Anytime A Fan Touches You, You Have The Right To Beat The Hell Out Of Him

My Initial Response Was To Sue Her For Defamation Of Character, But Then I Realized That I Had No Character.

There's Only 5 Real Jobs In The World. Teacher, Fireman, Policeman, Doctor And Somebody Who Is In The Armed Service. If You Don't Have One Of Those 5 Jobs, You Shouldn't Take Your Life That Serious.

I Don't Have Time To Put Up With The Politics. Who's A Democrat? Who's A Republican? Who's Liberal? Who's Conservative? Man, Can My Daughter Just Go To A School And Not Get Killed? Can These People Get A Good Job? That's What I'm Concerned About.

You Know What I Always Say About Basketball Whenever Anybody Tried To Tell Me The Knicks Are Gonna Be Good: They're Old. Old People Don't Get Healthy. They Die.