Another Air Traffic Controller Fell Asleep On

It Turns Out Enron Workers Were Not Only Shredding Documents At Work, They Were Having Sex At Work. Having Sex And Shredding Documents. Those Are Two Things You Don't Want To Get Mixed Up.

Tomorrow, America's Most Famous Hockey Mom, Sarah Palin, Will Drop The Ceremonial First Puck At The Philadelphia Flyers Game. Right Afterwards, She'll Get Out On The Ice And Skate Around Reporters' Questions, So It Should Be Interesting.

President Obama Told The Irish People That America Will Always Stand By Them, To Which Israel Laughed.

A Dead Body Was Discovered This Week On The Grounds Of A Country Estate Owned By Queen Elizabeth. The Queen Said Today She Hopes This Serves As A Reminder To Anybody On Her Staff That There Is A Right Way And A Wrong Way To Polish Sterling Silver.

The Heaviest Snowfall In Over 60 Years Is Being Reported In Beijing, China. To Give You An Idea Of How Bad It Is, The Army Is Now Using Snowplows To Run Over Dissidents.