According To The Mayans, The World Is

The Mayans Have Predicted The World Is Supposed To End On December 21. If The World Doesn't End On December 21, You Can Bet The Next Day The Malls Will Be Overrun With Mayans Trying To Buy Last-minute Gifts.

Now The Democrats Control The Senate. But The Good News Is That Now The Republicans Can Admit That Strom Thurmond Has Been Dead Since 1988.

Bill Maher And I Are On Against Each Other, And We're Friends. He Can Do My Show Any Time He Wants, And I've Done Politically Incorrect Several Times. There's No Reason To Think Competition Has To Be Adversarial.

There Are Reports On The News Tonight That Members Of The Taliban Feel Persecuted And Fear Their Own Safety. So Now They Know What It Is Like To Feel Like A Woman In Their Country.

We Should Make Politicians Dress Like Race Car Drivers -- When They Get Money, Make Them Wear The Company Logos On Their Suit.